🔗 Share this article

Bog Standard

Toilet humor has always been the comfort zone for daily publications, and publications remain attentive to significant toilet tales and historic moments, notably connected to soccer. It was quite amusing to discover that an online journalist a famous broadcaster has a West Brom-themed urinal at his home. Reflect for a moment for the Barnsley fan who interpreted the restroom a little too literally, and had to be saved from the vacant Barnsley ground following dozing off in the toilet at half-time during a 2015 defeat against Fleetwood Town. “He had no shoes on and misplaced his cellphone and his headwear,” explained an official from the local fire department. And nobody can overlook during his peak popularity with Manchester City, the controversial forward popped into a local college for toilet purposes back in 2012. “Balotelli parked his Bentley outside, then entered and inquired directions to the restrooms, subsequently he entered the faculty room,” a pupil informed a Manchester newspaper. “After that he was just walking through the school like he owned the place.”

The Toilet Resignation

Tuesday represents 25 years since Kevin Keegan stepped down from the England national team post a quick discussion within a restroom stall with FA director David Davies deep within Wembley Stadium, subsequent to the memorable 1-0 setback versus Germany during 2000 – England’s final match at the historic stadium. As Davies recalls in his journal, FA Confidential, he had entered the sodden beleaguered England dressing room right after the game, seeing David Beckham weeping and Tony Adams “fired up”, both of them pleading for the suit to bring Keegan to his senses. Following Dietmar Hamann’s free-kick, Keegan moved wearily along the passageway with a blank expression, and Davies found him slumped – reminiscent of his 1996 Liverpool behavior – within the changing area's edge, muttering: “I’m off. I’m not for this.” Collaring Keegan, Davies attempted urgently to save the circumstance.

“What place could we identify for a private conversation?” stated Davies. “The tunnel? Full of TV journalists. The locker room? Packed with upset players. The shower area? I was unable to have a crucial talk with the team manager as squad members entered the baths. Merely one possibility emerged. The lavatory booths. A crucial incident in the Three Lions' storied past happened in the old toilets of a venue scheduled for destruction. The coming demolition was almost tangible. Leading Kevin into a compartment, I closed the door after us. We stayed there, eye to eye. ‘My decision is final,’ Kevin declared. ‘I'm leaving. I'm not capable. I'll announce to journalists that I'm not competent. I'm unable to energize the team. I can't extract the additional effort from these athletes that's required.’”

The Results

And so, Keegan resigned, eventually revealing he viewed his tenure as national coach “empty”. The two-time European Footballer of the Year stated: “I found it hard to fill in the time. I found myself going and training the blind team, the deaf squad, assisting the women's team. It's an extremely challenging position.” The English game has progressed significantly during the last 25 years. For better or worse, those Wembley toilets and those two towers are long gone, although a German now works in the coaching zone Keegan formerly inhabited. Thomas Tuchel’s side are among the favourites for the upcoming Geopolitics World Cup: National team followers, value this time. This specific commemoration from one of England's worst moments serves as a recall that situations weren't always this good.

Real-Time Coverage

Follow Luke McLaughlin at 8pm UK time for Women’s Bigger Cup updates concerning Arsenal's match against Lyon.

Today's Statement

“We stood there in a lengthy line, clad merely in our briefs. We represented Europe's top officials, premier athletes, inspirations, grown-ups, parents, determined individuals with high morals … yet nobody spoke. We hardly glanced at one another, our gazes flickered a bit nervously as we were summoned forward in pairs. There Collina observed us from top to bottom with a chilly look. Quiet and watchful” – former international referee Jonas Eriksson discloses the embarrassing processes referees were previously subjected to by ex-Uefa refereeing chief Pierluigi Collina.

Soccer Mailbag

“How important is a name? There exists a Dr Seuss poem named ‘Too Many Daves’. Have Blackpool suffered from Too Many Steves? Steve Bruce, along with aides Steve Agnew and Steve Clemence have been dismissed through the exit. So is that the end of the club’s Steve obsession? Not completely! Steve Banks and Steve Dobbie continue to take care of the first team. Total Steve progression!” – John Myles.

“Since you've opened the budget and provided some branded items, I've opted to write and make a pithy comment. Ange Postecoglou states that he picked fights in the schoolyard with youngsters he anticipated would defeat him. This pain-seeking behavior must justify his choice to sign with Nottingham Forest. As a lifelong Spurs supporter I will always be grateful for the second-season trophy yet the only follow-up season honor I predict him achieving by the Trent, if he lasts that long, is the Championship and that would be some struggle {under the present owner” – Stewart McGuinness.|